Happy New Year 2009

Whoa~ it been a eventful 2008 , particularly the second half of the year when my life finally stabilized. Good times indeed and hopeful this new year will be a lot better.

New year means new resolutions but how far did I fulfill my last ones? Lets check them out:

1. Get a decent creative-related job. Check.
2. Lost 15 kg of fat and gain 5 kg of muscle. Total failed.
3. Make and finish my own manga/comic. Failed.
4. Learn to read and write Mandarin. Failed.
5. Learn basic Japanese. Failed.
6. Take a driving lesson test. Failed.
7. Buy a PC tablet. Check.
8. Be more people friendly. Check.
9. Update my blog more often. Failed.
10. Make at least 2 finished artworks a week. Failed.

Guess I got 3 out of 10 then which mean I did bad :P. As for resolution no. 2- I gain more than 5 kg of fat and a rather noticeable tummy. * Sigh* Good times indeed .....

So what my new resolution? I think the old ones still hold plus:

1. Lose my single status.
2. Clean up the house and maintain it.
3. Get better salary

Well, there's now 10 resolutions for the new year. Hope I can fulfill most of them this time :D
Wish you all a better year ahead.

Celebrating 27 Years of Existence

Well, not that I was celebrating anything today as the day went past quite normally. The only thing that made today more significant was that i have been around for the full 27 years. So yeah, today's my birthday. Then again, the day went on as usual, save for a few wishes from my colleages. The only birthday gift i received today was the fact i got my salary banked in. Yippee~ At least i got to spent for a present to myself this weekend. Haha. Kinda like a lonely fella isn't it? Lolz

So, a few more years i gonna hit the big 30. Sigh~
Guess I have to work a lot harder and since i have a stable, nice job now, i should be more than grateful. Life better now than 1 year ago. An improvement, i'll say. :D A lot better. Hopefully, it will be great next year and that same day will be a celebration.

And thanks all for the birthday wishes.

Hisasiburi Dana

Finally getting the mood to blog again. Since the last update, I've either been busy , having a mental block or just plain lazy. Anyway enough of the excuses, since it's pointless. Heh~
Anyway, during the period, my life was having a transition of sorts. And hopefully a turn for the better. Seems my life got too many turns . Like going into circles.

I'm now back in PJ, staying the same place i left behind a year ago. Kinda ironic issit. And got myself a new job now with even more hectic schedule and longer working hours than any job i work on so far. Well, it least the job is within the industry i into.

To be precise, I'm working in Animasia Studio- an animation house specialized in using flash for making animated tv series. Right now, we are in the middle of a big international project with tight deadline. Great timing. Anyway, been working for almost a month now and kinda settled in. But one thing I yet to get used to is the fast working speed on a assigned job. Well, I'm a slow and steady kinda guy and quite worry that this may cost me the job. But still, my colleagues there are kinda supportive which made my day a little less stressful. As long i try a bit hard everyday, I'll think i can improve sooner or later.

Well, it kinda late and I not sure what to write about. But there another posting that i took the time previously to write, right after this post :)

Btw, been playing Cabal Online these days... Care to join me?

New Year 2008

Today is New Year's eve and in a few hours later, we'll ushered into the year 2008. While most people around my age in the country went out and celebrate the big occasion, I on the other hand, have no choice but to feel melancholy about this. For me, there's not much to celebrate about. Anyway, i still rather looking hopeful for the new year ahead.

I never really did New Year resolutions before though i always try out something in the middle of the year before giving up midway (exercising regularly etc). Still, i hope to make one this year.

1. Get a decent creative-related job.
2. Lost 15 kg of fat and gain 5 kg of muscle.
3. Make and finish my own manga/comic.
4. Learn to read and write Mandarin.
5. Learn basic Japanese.
6. Take a driving lesson test.
7. Buy a PC tablet.
8. Be more people friendly.
9. Update my blog more often.
10. Make at least 2 finished artworks a week.

Hopefully, i able to fulfil all of them by the end of next year. Guess i have to add stronger willpower to the list too, lol. Anyway, before i pen off the final post of the year, I like to thank anyone for reading this blog for the past 2 years. Yeah, the blog is two years old already. And before I forget, wish you all Happy New Year 2008.

9th Month

August came and gone. And now into the month of September. Sigh~
Been almost a month and yet not much has change. No job, no money, no idea... getting lost.
Yeah, hardly any job here since it's small town after all and no one offering any despite my family network of friends. Or so they say. So now, i'm face with a dilemma- continue staying in hometown and waiting for any job offers- locally or from singapore; or go back to KL where it's more malaysian friendly....
And like all choices, there's the pros and cons of all things.

My mum wishes me to work in singapore or locally so that i can be nearer to home. And by staying at home, i dun need spend any money for anything since almost everything is provided (except pc and online). Not that i doing nothing at home, mind you. As any good son or daughter, i did my share of housework and stuffs. The bad part is that i could be waiting forever for work as time pass by wastefully and Singapore may just be too advanced for me.

If i go back to KL to find job, it might be easier but previous problems that made me leave the 1st time may crop up. 1st is the cost of living- family just dun have the money to let me spent in KL. Second, the transportation- some workplaces just inconvenient to reach, unless u own a car or live nearby. And 3rd is maybe my portfolio- just not good enough or just too unspecialize. I'm a jack of all trades but master of none.
Well, just say i not sure what to do now..

On another note, since i have all the time at home, i been working on a story or stories of my own manga. Everything still pretty rough now and not even sure if i can pull it off. Been doing a lot of concept art these days. Just too bad i dun have a decent pc of my own or else thing will be much easier. On another hand, i been working out too for some time. Yeah, i got fatter and lazier so it's wise to start exercising. Hope i can get fitter and better looking by the year end :D

Overweight and Underproductive

This few months of living without finance related food restriction has made me gain some weight. How is that? Haha, you see- back when i was living in PJ, away from home, i'll always restricted my spending on food. So i almost had plain rice or bread everyday for both lunch and dinner. Yeap, i seldom had breakfast. Even then, i was occupied with stuffs to do like doing digital art or gaming on my pc. So i was too busy to eat. Then again, there nothing to eat anyway. Even i didn't exercise much, i only gain a little weight.

So now, full plated lunch and dinner everyday and not to mention some cookies munching in the time between, i was so pampered at home. Even during my stay at Singapore, my aunt make sure i have 3 meals a day. And without some calories burning, my stomach transformed into a tyre. *sweats* Now, my problem is i dun really motivated to do some exercise. Yeah, you can say i was pretty lazy. I rather let stress fix this for me when i work, hopefully soon enough.

4th July 2007: 26 Years Of Existence

Yow~ it's this day again.

As the years past, the day's significance has reduced to nothing but an ordinary day. Unless you are living on that particular country, there nothing to celebrate about around me.

Well, this year, this date's importance have been over-shadowed by one date, - 07.07.2007. Yeah, apart from the once in a lifetime mega event, Live Earth, there also an event much more closer to home- Cousin Cheong's official wedding day. Yup, as i mention another day, i guess i'll be going to KL to attend the wedding after all. Anyway, i'll brag about the day on another post soon.

As for me, my 26 years of life is getting more.... how i put it, uneventful. No job, no close friends around me, no one really understand me- i dun even understand myself sometimes, and no place to belong to. Strange to think about it that how my life has come to this. What's the reason of my existence?

Most of my family said that i still young. Young, ...young?! People at the age of 25 already achieved much in their life, their dream, their career, and i still struggling around for survival. Why i ended up like this? Where did i go wrong?

"Dont dream too big, better to leave your foot on the ground."

What? So that i can be like you working under someone like hell just for sake of money and survival. Please. Life is much more that that.

Is my thinking wrong? Or life is really just like that? Why can i do things i want in life instead to be governed by money?

I really adore those guys who now really sucessful just by doing the things they like- which not related to money. Steven Spielberg- filming, Rumiko Tanaka- manga drawing, J.K. Rowling- writing and many others. All these individual are rich and famous in their respective field. It not all about money. And they all started when they are younger than me now, well except for Rowling.

I really wish now for a chance to do the thing that i have passion of, that give me more to my life that just survival.

Another Mundane Week

I just had dinner with my brothers at Asia Cafe, Subang Jaya. A rather nice place.. much more lively than SS2 i think. Why not. The place is surrounded by Taylor Uni Collage, Metropolitian College and Damansara College (i think) You can say it the place full of young adults (like us) hanging out.. lol. Pity i dun have any pics to show :P

Well, another week passed by without anything worthwhile happening. Hm, my life is getting cheap. Other than playing guild war on Ragnarok Online twice aweek, there's nothing to look forward to. Sigh~

Back for The New Year 2007

Yowza~!!
First post of the year, lol.
Meant to post some (lots, more likely) earlier but due to some unforseen circumstances- taiwan earthquake, going back hometown etc etc, i unable to do so.

Anyway, a quick update.

• New House- we pretty much settled in. Up till now, everything seems ok. There some stuffs that still in the boxes... not sure where to unpack to. And we still not familiar with its exact address. Need to memorize it soon.

• Work- I've been laid off last month. So i back to being unemployed status lol. Actually i have expected it since i literaly gave up on the job on the 3rd month... only to held on it longer due to the the money :P Anyway, hope i will have a better job sooner or i will repeat last year's problem again T.T

• Friends- Nothing much to write about. Only hope to arrange a supper with those who live at where i lived previously soon. And to make up with a misunderstood friend i mention last time.. :)

• Family- I went back hometown for a few days. Still not much to talk with my mum openly though. As with my siblings, still ok. Well, life goes on since the passing of my grandpa, everything seems going back to normal. And I seems to gotten older looking how my baby cousin grow. Still as kawaii as ever lol.
  

• Others- Life without constant connection to the net was hard this past few days. So i make myself busy playing pc games and watching anime :P Aih, gotto look for work too. Really getting bored.

I think thats about it, i think :P Hard to think what to write about with all the noise around me (in a cybercafe now). Still, i try to update as often as possible this year. Even with all the things happened at the start of the new year, I still believe 2007 will be a far better year. To all, Happy Belated New Year~~!
Cheers :)

Begining of an End

In about a few weeks from now, we'll bid good bye to 2006. And from this final month onwards there gonna be some changes going on. Some good, some bad but hopefully they are for the best.

So in coming week, if all goes well, i will move from Setapak, KL to Section 17, PJ along with my bros. Well, kinda heavy-hearted to move away from the area where i have been living for about 6 years. Gonna miss some friends there, the cybercafes, the BRJ mamak restaurant, the Hartini malay stall..... well, pretty much everything there.

So i gonna be quite busy this and the coming weeks. Tie up all the loose ends, pack things up, throw things away, clean up the current house etc etc *sweats* As for the apartment which i'll be moving in, well, i will go have a look this Sat. LoL, yeah.. i havent see the house yet but my bro did and he said not bad actually.... Well, at least the rent is the cheapest of all we looked in that area and pretty much near my work place and Utar :)

Work-wise, i now in my 4th month and things pretty much settled in. Though there still some problems but then i dun really bother anymore. As long i do my job and there's cash coming in, i pretty much satisfied.

So the coming 2007, i believe, will gonna be a better year.

Crying (Care)Freeman

I wonder why i wanna blog about this too... but then again this one of the reason why i blog in the 1st place...

Anyway, all the years since i was a young teen, i always maintain an emotionless look... especially when bad things happen around me. Even during my father's death, my grandpa or even my fav grandma where everyone else cried openly... i was always without a single drop of tear. Even i myself tot my heart was harden without the feeling of sadness... or maybe it my care-free attitude. I can feel happy but not sadness. Maybe the happiness might been an act.

Still, a lot time. i really wish to cry out. The passing of my father, my broken relationship wif my ex, and especially during the recent year. Yet i cant. Not a drop. A robot like human.

And yesterday night, i just erupted.

I received my salary of the month and hopes to dine out. Yet i dun felt like eat alone. My bros got their own things to do. A few friendly phone calls, a few sms. No favorable result. Then i decide to eat some leftover bread at home. Alone.

Later all bros came back and we discussed about the house moving problem. It became heated when the third and i argued. Second bro tends to not get involve or things might get worse. Soon the third (currently taking a degree in psychology) said something which felt akin to what Steve Irvin got in his last moment... maybe even worst.

I shouted back in rage and retreated to my room. I was trying to calm down when mum phoned. And when talking to her, i suddenly just exploded in tears. I was cried and sobbed like a 3 year old. It was like all the accumulated pressure, disappointments and grief just burst open. Unable to speak properly, i handed the phone to my 2nd bro who standing there stunned ( he said much later that's the 1st time he saw me cried in his whole life)

Obviously, my mum was dead worried when she suddenly heard me like this.

Soon i was able to calm down and was dumb-founded that i cried just then.... Just so surreal. My bro and mum (second phone call) was relieved. Sorry for making u all so worried ;P
Later i made peace to my third bro. Hey, we brothers after all.....

So i cried. Real man cries, as the saying goes. Hey, I'm a human after all. After this episode, I hope things will get better.

Drastic Times In Need of Drastic Action

Aye.
This year's been, well, a nightmare in need of waking up from... everything went wrong where ever i been into. My job, finance state and even my relationship with my family is kinda rocky.

Everything that have been lead into this was due to a series of unwise decisions of mine and situations that went against me. A heavy burden taking toll on a simple minded guy like me.

Well, in a next few days I'll will be taking some drastic action and hope these ease some burden of mine and in ways, help those who were affected by those unwise decisions of mine. No, i not thinking of doing something stupid.. lol

Then what i planning to do? Well, u'll find out in the next few days.